You know the saying that people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime? Well as I get older, I realise that it’s so true and I can clearly see those periods carved out in my own friendships. As I grow and get wiser and also, I guess, grow as a person – I no longer need somebody else to validate me! – it’s easier for me to accept that a certain friendship has run its course and come to an end, and then to move on. My younger self would pine over the friendship, run after the person, try and reconnect or go out of my way to rekindle the relationship…my older self, not so much.
Right now, I can see it happening with a certain friend of mine. We went from being colleagues to work friends. To outside of work friends. Even to being couple friends! But recently, I’ve noticed that the friendship seems to be fizzling out. In fact, this year when I put my birthday guest list together, I even um’d and ah’d about whether I should extend the invitation to her and her husbands. From always catching up after a weekend over a coffee, e-mail or a call, to now only touching base mid-week. No longer knowing what her weekend plans are and when she’s next travelling to xyz. No longer catching up for dinner when her husband is away for work – in fact, not even knowing when her husband is not around and hearing about it once he’s already returned.
I’m not sure if it’s just ME…but even our approach and outlook on life has changed drastically…mostly on the work front. Recently, she confided in me about another colleague and how every time she speaks to her, she complains and has nothing good to say about anybody else. I did the polite thing and listened and nodded and heard her out all the while thinking…that is exactly how I feel about you! Her negativity has been draining me for quite some time now. And what’s worse is that I love my company and my job so hearing her complain so much is actually driving me giddy.
At any rate, I feel us drifting apart more and more and I can’t help but think that maybe this season of friendship is coming to an end and that I should accept it and move on…